Craw is back, tell a friend. I know I've been blogging as often as Daniel Day-Lewis makes movies. What no good? Sorry, I'm a little rusty, I know I've been blogging as often as Harper Lee releases novels. Still no good? Let's try this one last time, I know I've been blogging as often as my Grandmother gets laid. There it is, octogenarian penetration humor, now that feels right! It's like riding a goddamn bike people...
I feel like an alcoholic who's been sober for a few months, but is ready to go on a bender. I'm not saying I'll be the post whore of 2008, that guy would have gone down on an AIDS patient if it meant he could get a good blog post out of it, but hopefully I'll get the word to the page at least once a week this year. So you can stop by, read my shit and say to yourself "My life may not be a bowl of cherries but at least I'm not this ass-tard." As a side note adding 'tard' to the end of any curse word instantly makes me smile like a gold medal winner at the Special Olympics.
So there you have it, my Martin Luther King Jr.'s Day resolution, blog once a week and try to have a dream, not about racial equality, but about Jersey Shore chicks getting punched in the face, because that shit is much funnier.
Now if you'll excuse me I need to replace the lube I borrowed from my Grandma, before she gets home from Red Lobster.
2 comments:
oh....my....
welcome back. hey, email me your address. our holiday card was returned to sender. you should blog about the absurdity of holiday cards.
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